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Is my idea of a story any good?
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Kat Kinz
 08 Sep 2016, 19:29 #199061 Reply To Post
I've got an idea for a story but not sure if it's any good. Can I post it here, see what you think?

Phantom Revenge -Working Title

If you asked Max about his motorcycle accident, he’ll tell you he can’t remember it. Not even the smell of burning rubber can evoke the memory of screeching of brakes, clattering of metal against metal as he sheared into the barrier. Or even the aftermath of flashing red lights, screaming sirens and voices shouting and the soft sound of sobbing.

It was the worst accident ever recorded in the village, witnesses reported to newsmen that Max was renown for his expensive motorbikes and it wasn’t the first time he’d skidded off the road. But this time, he wasn’t so lucky, he’d broken his ribs, both legs, his lung had collapsed and he’d severed his arm on impact.

Max has always been a bit of a lad, always getting into some scrape or another while his parents worked. He had a good relationship with his mum, she was kind with a soft heart and many of a time covered for him, so he didn’t get into trouble with his dad.

When Max was sixteen a fatal car accident killed both his mother and father. Max moved in with his maternal grandparents but became inwardly sad and outwardly wild.

Max loved riding his bikes and living life dangerously, enjoying the adrenalin rush. He hated the emotion he felt around women, he’d rather push them away. He ridiculed those who knew nothing about cars or bikes only talking to women who did, making conversation easier for him. Then he met Ellie who liked the same things as he did. She was his first love, but he couldn’t show any feelings toward her, he could only tease her in a childish way, sometimes in a cruel way. She died on the day of the accident. Her body flung high in the air, landing upside down on the white car that Max had just seen, before squeezing the brakes. Max didn’t remember. Max didn’t want to remember.

Almost two years later, recuperating from the accident, Max and Adrienne purchased and moved into a farmer’s cottage on the attractive side of the village. With Max’s inheritance and Adrienne’s wage they were able to buy their first home together. They’d met in hospital, where Adrienne was a nurse.

With Adrienne things were different, more grown up and he was falling in love for the second time. The accident had taken its toll but Max was learning to survive as an amputee after losing his arm. However, when Max started to hear strange noises in the cottage he believed supernatural forces were at work, haunting him in revenge for the accident he couldn’t remember and which he genuinely believed wasn’t his fault.

Max didn’t know he was being watched or of the terror that awaited him.
dancingsue
 09 Sep 2016, 09:31 #199070 Reply To Post
In order to receive feedback it is necessary that you first fulfil your obligations by reading and reviewing someone else's work. You receive a credit which you can then attach to your story. Good luck.
the long and the short of it

Kat Kinz
 09 Sep 2016, 12:04 #199073 Reply To Post
I'd better get cracking. Thanks for the advice.
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